He Said/She Said


HE SAID/SHE SAID

10. He said: I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
She said: You wear briefs, don't you?

9. She said: What do you mean by coming home half drunk?
He said: It's not my fault...I ran out of money.

8. He said: Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love to you in the worst way.
She said: Well, you succeeded.

7. He said: Two inches more, and I would be king'.
She said: Two inches less, and you'd be queen'

6. On wall in ladies room: "My husband follows me everywhere."
Written just below it: "I do not."

5. He said: Shall we try a different position tonight?"
She said: "That's a good idea...you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart.

4. Priest: I don't think you will ever find another man like your late husband.
She said: Who's gonna look?

3. He said: What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
She said: Turn sideways and look in the mirror.

2. He said: Let's go out and have some fun tonight.
She said: Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway light on.

1. He said: Why don't you tell me when you have an orgasm?
She said: I would but you're never there.